@nicole It's at least difficult, because you can't really influence, how your messages are received /decoded (if I understand the communication theories right)
@flns sure, but you can choose what you say based on how you think it will be received. that's the basis of all communication. and here, I'm noticing that what I say is communicating something I *don't* intend, but I'm not sure why!
@nicole that's totally right, but it's still based on what you think, not on the other person's thoughts and feelings.
it's odd, sure.
Do you know the four - sides model from Schulz von Thun? As I remember it, you can't control as sender which side is received.
You can try to state explicitly 'this is not an excuse' in front of your explanation, but this may also have side effects